To write or not to write?

For the longest time, I’ve wanted to write a book. Sort of an autobiography. It would essentially be about the time of my life that was the darkest; my drug addiction. That was eight years of my life. Eight long years. There is so much that I don’t remember, but so much that I do.

Recently, I have been thinking more and more about that part of my life. I have repressed so much, but it seems that when I start to think about one thing, I remember three more things.

The other day, while we were out at my parents’ house, I was talking about my blog and some comments I have gotten about it, what I should do to promote it, and so on. I told my mom that I had read that I need to figure out why I started a blog, and decide what my end goal is. Both my mom and my kids mentioned that I should write a book. Since then, the thought of doing so has been extremely ubiquitous in my mind.

The only thing I’m worried (and not even actually “worried”) about it bringing up old ‘memories’ that other people have put to rest. I have come to terms with everything that has happened, but I can’t say for certain that everyone else has. I was involved with a lot of people during that time frame, a lot have passed away, and the others, I don’t have contact with. I cut ties with everyone I was associated with when I moved.

There are so many questions that need to be answered before I even think of making any sort of decision.

Where do I start?

Would my SO be okay with it?

Do I use fake names for everyone? If I decide to use everyone’s real name, do I need permission first?

How long does it take to write, edit, and publish a book?

How do you even get published?

How do you market your book?

Is it better to hire a publisher or should you self-publish?

How much does it actually cost to write a book?

How many people is this book going to upset? Should that even matter?

etc…

So. Many. Questions..

This is a big thing, weighing heavily on my mind, and I could use any and all guidance. If anyone has any tips, knows anyone that has written a book, knows any good websites to recommend, or has any connections with someone that could easily answer some of my questions, please let me know!!

**And before anyone says anything about how this would affect my kids, and/or what they think of me… my kids know about my past. I’m very open with them. I don’t hide anything from them or deny anything that I have done/gone through. They are very supportive of me and everything that I do.**

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